Heartland Brewery

by Jonathan Kosakow

The first time I went to a Heartland Brewery, I had high expectations.  "A brew pub in New York City?" I thought.  "How could you go wrong?"  Well, I'll tell you how you could go wrong: by walking into a Heartland Brewery with high expectations.  

On this first visit I ordered the flight of beers, and was able to sample all of their brews within an hour. Needless to say, I was drunk by the end of this, and most likely slurring my speech. Luckily, the friend I was with followed suit, and neither of us was trying to sleep in the other's bed (his name is Andrew, and he has his own big boy bed). Towards the end of the sampler, I could hardly tell the difference between the stout and the porter. I thought this was just because my senses were dulled by the hour's worth of alcohol I had imbibed, but since then I have been proven wrong.

For whatever reason, I have gone back to the Heartland Brewery a number of times since then, and I am always disappointed in their beer. At this point, I feel like I have tried just about all of the 20-odd concoctions they have hastily thrown together, and for the life of me I can't remember ONE that stands out above the rest. Aside from the flashy logos that they assign to each new recipe, there is literally no reason for me to even read the description of each beer, besides fro the sake of being polite.

I've assessed the problem over and over in my head (I know, there are more constructive things I could be doing, but I won't defend my useless analytical leanings), and what I've come up with is that the Heartland Brewery is not a spot for beer lovers. Hell, it's hardly a spot for New Yorkers. It is a spot for tourists, for people looking for a theme, for people more interested in decor and surroundings of a restaurant than in what they are ingesting. The Heartland Brewery is more concerned with making money than making beer, so they follow the simple recipe for that: over-advertise, overcharge, under-work (that is nothing against the wait staff or bartenders, the service is actually quite good).  So, I realize now, that this is less of a review of a beer or a brewery than it is of a tourist trap. Sorry to everyone, if I've wasted your time.

Fireside Nut Brown ale

Reviewed by Michael Stein

In the vain of all things manly and kickass, Leinenkugel's Fireside Nut Brown Ale is a touch of brown testosterone in a bottle. So its only fitting my girlfriend's father blessed me with a case as a belated Christmas gift. I've stretched the four six packs out over the course of a couple of weeks and cherished its every drop, but this just goes to show the beer's versatility. The truly nice thing about this brew is the fact that the glass I filled one and a half times, I killed in about 6 sips. So just to juxtapose, it's a beer that tastes delicious for hours on end, beer after beer. I can attest to this personally, as I spent a good deal of Thanksgiving Day doing so. The beer has a 4.9% ABV, so it's a cut above your standard, but still lighter than most pale ales. However, as this case tends to cost around $30.00, I would recommend chipping away at the delectable "ale" at a snail's pace. But as I like to say, this beer was the best price, free ninety nine!

Upon first sip the beer has a sweet, caramel and almost hints of bitter bubblegum taste. My girlfriend would probably tell you this beer tasted like molasses. The taste is maple, definitely a strong taste of maple syrup. The irony in all of this, is that the current most-recent reviewer over @ ratebeer, writes "Notes of chocolate, nuts, hazelnut, but it seems very forced, i.e, artificial. Thin mouthfeel. Metallic finish. A strange brew that will appear to women and rubes who think they're drinking something exotic or high class." HA! And I thought I was chauvinistic!

When talking with fellow beer-guy Chris K., last week, he mentioned that he felt the Leini's Sunset Wheat was fantastically refreshing at first sip, but that the taste of orange and copper overcame the beer's appealing flavor by the end of a long night…a long night of say, playin' some bass kickin rhythm & blues and funky drums for hours whilst killin' a case. I know how he felt, but still I'd prefer a happy hour's worth of Sunset Wheat over a say, Shock Top, or Blue Moon any day. On a hot summer day, a Leinenkugel's Summer Shandy would be the only thing better!

At the Second sip, its clear; coffee, and definitive caramel, almost comparable to a Duncan doughnuts hazelnut iced coffee taste. But sometimes I like drinking those and therefore I like drinking this beer. Also of note, another similarity to Shock Top, Leinenkugel's was purchased in 1988 by Miller Brewing, although Leinenkugel's began making their "craft brews" in the 1980s. Shock Top is owned by Anheuser-Busch and was first introduced in 2006. I'm not certain, but I believe the Fireside Nut Brown ale is less than a year old, as it is a winter seasonal, only released in November and December (however you may be lucky enough to find it in October or January as well). Just like the Summer Shandy, this Leinenkugel's beer is under two year old, but you can count on it to be around to stay. So try to drink a toast to either summer or winter, year round. Prost!

Samuel Smith's Organic Lager

by Jonathan Kosakow

I sat down for dinner with some family in an Upper East Side Vegan restaurant the other night (could I sound more white?), and the first question we all asked was what they had at the bar. OK, the first question I asked was what they had at the bar. As I perused the beer list, I noticed something that I should have assumed from the beginning: everything was organically produced.

I've had some experience with organically produced beers in the past, mainly at the Selin's Grove Brewing Company, as well as through the Pinkus and Peak Organic brews, but here in front of me was a list of organic beers most of which I had never heard of. I'm sure you can imagine the feeling of ecstatic ecstasy that engulfed me. I'm also sure you can imagine the dread when I realized that each beer was a minimum of $7, and disappointment when I came to my senses and realized I couldn't in good conscience drink the entire list while sitting down to a quiet dinner with family.

Organic beers are a trend quickly gaining popularity in the beer industry. According to the Associated Press, sales of organic beers rose 111% between 2003 and 2005, and has continued to rise since then, prompting even companies like Anheuser-Busch to test a couple of their own.

I felt rushed to order, which is probably a good thing as otherwise I would have spent an easy twenty minutes debating with myself, but I settled quickly on a brewery which I have some familiarity with, and a beer with which I had none.

When I poured Samuel Smith's Organic Lager into my glass, I noticed how smoothly it flowed, and how delicate it looked. I let it sit for just a few seconds before the head settled perfectly. The color is uncharacteristic of most lagers, but more like a slightly-thicker-than-normal Pilsner. Upon first sip though, it was clear that this was no Pilsner. It's full flavored, with a light yet slightly creamy palate, and washes down your throat smoothly. Similar to the other organic brews I've sampled, this Lager tastes incredibly fresh, and was the perfect accompaniment to the light meal customary to a Vegan dinner. However, I would not limit this beer to always play the role of "good company" - it is one suitable for any occasion. It has what Bud Light claims to have: drinkability. It goes down smoothly and sits in your stomach lightly, but doesn't lack the delicate balance of hops and malt to be called "good quality." It may not be easy to find, and it may not be cheap, but I fully recommend giving this one a try.

Bethlehem Brew Works

by Dan Raposo


BBW Pumpkin Ale
BBW Fegley's E.S.B.
BBW Steelgaarden Wit



It seems that every family has their lackey. The person that gets stuck driving the others to and from the airport, gets the last minute groceries on holidays, you get the idea. Well in my family, I'm that guy. It's not so much because I'm a pushover, but mainly because I don't mind doing the errands nobody else wants to do, especially when they involve long drives and new places. Lucky for me, one of these such excursions led me to Bethlehem Brew Works in Bethlehem, PA.

A friend of my family's, who happens to be a priest, flew up from Florida to visit an old friend at his first parish in Bethlehem. My dad was supposed to drive him the 2.5 hours from CT to PA that Saturday morning, but the chauffeur duties inevitably fell to me (and of course my visiting girlfriend) We got there just after 10am, and after a short visit to the Church, my girlfriend and I took off to let the priests catch up. Fulfilling my need to explore, we drove around the town for a while until I saw Bethlehem Brew Works, shining like the Star of Bethlehem leading me to a refreshing beer experience. Sorry for the Jesus talk, but with the priests and Bethlehem, I had to work that in somewhere. Don't worry, it'll be the last bad reference to the Christmas story I make. And so, without further ado, the three gifts from the wise men of Bethlehem Brew Works. (I lied)

When I order a seasonal brew like a Pumpkin or a Holiday Winter, I want distinct and robust flavors of whatever is supposed to set the beer apart. So when I ordered the Pumpkin Ale I was hoping for something hearty, full of the flavors that make the fall season, pumpkin, cinnamon, something!!! What I got was a dweeb of an Ale with a hint of pumpkin. No spices, no robust flavors, nothing. If they were trying to create a lighter ale using pumpkins, something you could drink all night, they succeeded. But I'm not buying it, it was weak, light, and simple. My girlfriend loved the hint of pumpkin though, so I let her finish it.

After the Pumpkin Ale I decided to step it up a bit to protect my manhood, so I ordered the Fegley's ESB. The ESB gave me hope for BBW and did so by kicking my ass. The ESB is a British style amber, but not pale skinned, bad toothed type British, more like a British pit bull, with rabies. When you first taste this red amber ale, the sweet but complex malts caress and tickle the taste buds, then the succulent hop variety sucks the sweetness right out, leaving you dazed and confused, like you were just hit by a baldheaded British rugby thug, and then woken up by his hot sister. Overall, a highly enjoyable beer.

After the ESB I thought I would chill out a bit with the pubs most popular beer, the Steelgaarden Wit. I thought I was getting a relaxing Belgian wheat, but what I got was a complex and spicier version of this very traditional style. When poured, it looked just like an unfiltered wheat, hazy and golden in color but then when tasted, the chamomile and coriander took the beer to a new level, giving a typically simple style a fuller and much deeper taste.

Bethlehem Brew Works also had an interesting variety of fruit infused beers, which my girlfriend tried and I avoided after the first sip. Then after a few beers and some hot wings I got a call from the church and quickly remembered.... I had to drive the priest back home.


The Bethlehem Brew Works Website

Leinenkugel's Summer Shandy

By Matt Vekasy (circa July 25th, 2008)

It was a hot summer day in July and I took the day off to help my brother and his wife move. I showed up bright and early w/ a box o' coffee and we got to work... watching the movers do everything. (Lesson: helping people move who have hired movers is awesome). The moving was finished by noon and my brother and I made a trip to the grocery store and the liquor store. I picked up a 6-pack of Leinenkugel's Summer Shandy. I've had their sunset wheat before, but I wanted to try something new. I quickly realized that I had grabbed my new official summer moving beer.

This beer was so crisp and refreshing that by two beers in I wasn't thirsty for beer anymore. I can't tell you about the appearance or smell because I was parched and just drank it right out of the bottle. But I can tell you that this beer made me happy and after moving (alright not moving, but it was a hot day) all morning, Leinenkugel's Summer Shandy quenched my thirst. I remember not knowing what a shandy was when I bought it, but Leinenkugel's Summer Shandy tasted more like beer than of a wine cooler and left me refreshed and recharged.

I have since learned that Leinenkugel's Summer Shandy is a mix of lemonade and beer. More info can be found below:
Official website
Beer Advocate review

SBC Fairfield Red

by Dan Raposo


I just moved and in the midst of all the junk I found a couple bar napkins with almost illegible chicken scratch on them. Fortunately for me they were beer reviews and fortunately for you now I can post them. From what I can remember, and what I can understand from the napkin, it was a Friday sometime this summer when I drove up to Fairfield, CT to drop off some stuff for work. To my surprise and delight the office was across the street from the great Southport Brewing Company, which is as good as it gets for brewpubs in Southwestern CT.

It was one of those days where you want to be outside. 80 degrees, sunny, and driving around all day in my Jeep with the top down made me thirsty. I walked in to find a cute brunette behind the bar and thought my day couldn't get any better, until I remembered I have a girlfriend, and that she will probably read this at some point. Oh well, she'll probably laugh right.... A light refreshing beer and cool conversation, what better way to take the edge off a hot day, right? Wrong, the barkeep was pretty dull and bored me with her talk of grad school and other nonsense, and even worse, she missed the mark with her recommendation, the SBC Fairfield Red. (Just saved myself with the gf) I was instinctively puzzled by her recommendation, but I always trust a bartender's recommendation.

While I was really looking for something light and refreshing, this was a red....and this is about the point where my f'in cat tore the napkin apart. No I'm serious, the rest of the napkin has claw and teeth marks all over it with bits and pieces missing. I mean, the little guy is pretty cool most of the time, but really, a napkin? How is a napkin entertaining or a tasty treat?

Thankfully the Red was the only beer I drank at this sitting, so I can actually remember the situation and the beer. Light and refreshing doesn't quite describe this beer. In fact, it packed quite a punch, sucking what little moisture was left in my mouth from the dry conversation with the serving wench. I'm not trying to be harsh, but the beer started it, until of course I took another drink and realized it was quite good. After the initial bite, the Red really settled down and gave a great mixture of flavors, none if which I can really recognize because thats not really my thing. Oaky, nutty, a hint of caramel....sure, why not. What I do know is that the Fairfield Red tastes complex, with many flavors coming together, in and out at different times, packing a punch at first but finishing sweet and smooth, unlike this review and the napkin it was written on.

Recession Beers

by Jonathan Kosakow

In these times of financial peril, alcoholics and non-alcoholics alike are feeling a pinch on their leisure activities. Unfortunately for those of us who enjoy a beer with actual taste, having to watch our wallets also means often having to abstain from those rare bottles that our distributor picks up on a one-time-only basis. Now, you might be saying "Jonathan, how dare you drink a cheap beer!" or even "Dude, you've changed," but never fear my dear friends, I am simply a slave to the world around me, and am no different from you. We must adapt to our financial situations or be bitterly tossed off the island in Darwin-esque fashion, only to find out that all we had to do was eat pig testicles to win the million dollars. It is necessary to save a dollar here and there so that when the time counts, we can throw our shoulders back and our chests forward and buy the pretty girl on our left a Malibu and Pineapple Juice for $9.50. So with that said, I bring to you my very short list of beers that, even in a recession, we can enjoy to their fullest potential, without smashing the piggy banks our mothers gave us for our 5th birthday with the hammers our fathers gave us for Christmas later that year.

Pabst Blue Ribbon - At my local grocery store (Key Food in Astoria on 30th Avenue at the corner of 43rd Street - a fine establishment, I suggest you take a walk through), a 12-pack of PBR goes for $7.99 plus tax. Pick up a bag of chips on top of that, and you and a friend can each throw in $5 and be set for the night (or at least until halftime on Sunday). If you ask me, this is the best deal you can find. Though Natural Light and Milwaukee's Best might be a dollar cheaper, a cold can of PBR will go down smoothly with a hint of malts and hops, and will have far less chance of giving you an ulcer from the acidity. Some of you might prefer a Budweiser (or for the ladies, a Bud Light), but my question to you is, why spend $15 on a taste you can have for half that? And hell, in 2006 it won back that "Blue Ribbon" for the first time since 1893. Now that's quality that lasts.

Yuengling Lager - For Beer Guys like Tom and Chris, they can pick up a case of this delicious Lager at their local Pennsylvania distributor for under $25 (that's about $1 per beer), and for me here in New York, a 12-pack of long necks generally goes for about $14 (in cans for $12). That's not bad considering Coors and MGD sell for closer to $16 or $17. It also tastes like heaven.

Miller High Life - It may not live up to it's slogan, but the "Champagne of Beers" does go down smoothly when drunk (drank?) from the bottle (the can leaves a lot to be desired, besides the aftertaste of cheap aluminum). I couldn't tell you how much it costs these days, but I do know that the lightness in your wallet will feel worth it when you start getting a little light headed at around 10 this evening.

Colt 45, 40 oz. - Two dollars and twenty-five cents for forty ounces of beverage. That's cheaper than a bottle of "designer" water, whatever the hell that means. Speaking of water, here's another way to save money: pick up your jock and drink from the tap. Einstein did it, and so should you. (Note - I'm only guessing that Einstein drank from the tap).

Now, there are other options of course, but to be honest I'm just too lazy to do the "research" (by research I mean it's Monday evening and I don't feel like getting tanked just to educate you lazy cheapskates on how to save a couple bucks but still get a good buzz). Take my advice, or don't, see what I care, but don't come asking me for a dollar unless you put it to good use.